Can you handle the truth?

I was in Delhi recently for a friend's wedding. While it was a lot of fun catching up with old friends after a long time (and happily realized that not much has changed over the years), there was this one instance which evoked some thoughts that I have always believed in, but haven't revisited since some time now...

So there I was, in the hotel room watching some TV when the channel menu showed that they were playing "Before Sunrise"... Now, its been sometime since I saw that and "After Sunset"...

I have actively avoided watching these kinds of movies because you know, they are too much mush and pain in the name of romance. I am not into intense romantic movies anyway. They, somehow, drain me of my energy... and yeah, I can definitely do without feeling drained at the end of a movie!

Anyways, I had nothing better to do and was looking for an alternative, having watched news all morning...

I tuned in for sometime, only to find that some parts were actually thought-provoking (philosophical, maybe?)...

For how many of us actually take long walks with our partners? How many of us are truthful with them in that we can talk about our true feelings and thoughts with them? How many of us really ask them, "What about me really bugs you?"; and if we do, how many of us are willing to hear the raw truth?

Worse, if the question was directed at us, how many of us are going to be honest in our answers? Even if we are - or they are - how many of us will accept each others' quirks willingly and just let them be, not demanding any "action"? Just be content in knowing them for the better, not wanting to change them to suit our perception of what is "better" for them?

We all have thoughts which, at some level, are questionable, immoral or unorthodox at best. How many of us give the freedom to our partners to share them with us, without judging them? Most people do that with their friends because they can't do that with their so-called life partners, soul-mates or whatever mush you will...

Maybe we need to really ask the first question to ourselves -- Can you handle the truth?

...and am back!

Hadn't realized that I am writing after a gap of more than a year! Bloody 'ell!

Writing almost always helps me relax, though there are times when it brings on a bout of nostalgia and then, well... I get nostalgic ;P

Is it good? bad? stupid? Or, as the philosophers might say, natural (but) waste of time?

Just Thought...

I'm not a 'poem guy', but some lines have been doing the rounds in my mind since a few days. Thought it's better to dump them out than keep them inside.

A cry without tears,
   A laughter without smiles,
Pain without needles,
   The heart rendered vile

This sounds as if it should have a second stanza. Hmmm... Maybe later.

Just Thought...

And Oh! for the joys of solitude,
    Of silence, thoughts and options multitude,
Of freedom from the shackles of worldly pains,
    Of divine interventions and satanic gains.

To fire or not to fire....

Went through my first experience of firing - or, potentially so - an employee in the last week. I can understand today what a lot of HR managers might be going through when they have to fire an employee.

Ankush is a staff in accounting with us. Though not great, he is picking up fast... at least, better than his brother Rohan, who'd 'betrayed' us for a bigger company after we had literally trained him in the Debits and Credits of Accounting. We taught him our accounting software, MS Office and the basic fundamentals of how to go about the whole data-entry process and as soon as he was ready enough for us to trust him with bigger responsibilities, he left without any warning for a CA firm.

Left in the lurch, my brother and I trudged along till we could find someone again. That meant extra hours in the office...but, of course, we are quite mentally prepared for these speed-breakers now. Our accounting is quite complicated and not everyone's cup of tea, given that we use multiple applications and software to maintain all the data we need.

Anyways, so Rohan calls us one day and requests that we employ his brother Ankush, who is a novice but hard-working fellow. Well, beggars can't be choosers, we thought, as we hadn't found a suitable person just yet.

Even though Ankush came fed with a lot of feedback and training from his brother, we weren't quite satisfied. And frankly, we're tired of having to keep training accounting staff. The earlier incentive of taking on low-skilled people because they come cheap and don't have too many exit options is just not lucrative anymore. We are in that stage of business where acquiring good talent - even if it comes at a slightly uncomfortable premium - is a better idea than the previous one. Of course, I have been of this opinion for a long time, but in family business kind of structure, one has to wait patiently for everyone to ride the same boat. Oftentimes, pulling them on the deck is not the best course of action from synergy point of view.

So we were on the look-out for someone with relevant experience and skill. Samar comes along, has worked as an accountant for three years, is currently in Ops. in another firm out of some compulsion, and looking to switch to accounting again. To top it, he literally tells us he is ready to do anything we ask of him, if only we can help him quit his present job. He just needed to serve a month's notice period. Yay!

All this while, we chose not to inform Ankush that we are looking for his replacement and that he too, better start looking for another job. Well, to be frank, my brother was more of this opinion than I was. Like a lot of times, I chose to be negligent and silent.

So Samar comes along for his first day in office. I was quite uncomfortable, not only because I thought we were doing injustice to Ankush, but also because he had shown quite a considerable improvement in the past one month. I have a hunch he was on to us; he had heard us talking to Samar, though not clearly.

It was in this one month that I noticed what a fear of getting fired can do to an employee. It kicks off the survival instinct. He starts grasping stuff better and faster, starts taking initiatives to become more productive, develops - or at least shows - more interest in the work allotted to him and becomes more obedient generally.

It was also the time when I realized how difficult firing a person is. After all, he was depending on the salary I pay him every month to meet his expenses. Worse, he hadn't done anything wrong. True, he is not up to the mark and we can certainly do better with a more skilled and experienced employee.....but it's not his "fault". Yes, the contrary view is that it is his fault that he couldn't make himself indispensable to us. But we deserve better too. My brother and I are much more qualified and capable than to be sitting in front of computers updating our books of accounts entry by entry! So after some tweedle-dee, tweedle-dum, I am at peace with the fact that he must go when he must, in the interest of M/S Phoenix Creations and in the selfish interest of it's top management. In this competitive world, make yourself indispensable, or be disposed off.

But our manner of doing this exercise was wrong, in my opinion. We should have told him earlier. But my brother was of the opinion that we should wait for Samar to see the whole drill, decide that he still wanted the job and then fire Ankush. Point. But that would give Ankush less time to find a replacement! A small argument ensued and in the end, I told him to deal with the issue the way he wanted... and then realize how wrong his approach was. 

My argument was based also on the fact that Ankush was improving. After all, why was this guy suddenly upping his game so much? How could he suddenly develop such sincerity? Surely, something must be very important...

Yes, something was. I believe it was the fear of rejection, of being rendered useless. Of the embarrassment of not having a job, and therefore, a black spot on one's capability. 

But after just one day, Samar called to tell us that he wasn't going to join! Why? No answer. I thought he might be feeling like a winner, considering that we were paying him for a desk job what he was getting for a field job! After all, that was what he had told us in the interview, that he didn't like the field-work!

Anyways, so his story ended then and there. And it seems my brother's approach turned out to be the better one. More practical one. I thought we were being selfish. And unjust.

But it seems, being selfish and unjust is good at times. It is even the most practical, obvious and natural course of action at times. I have learnt this earlier the hard way. But I guess I still find it hard to put it into implementation.

There is a difference...

I may lead a dichotomous existence

Part conservative and part modernistic
Part cowardly and also courageous
Part confident and sometimes, nervous
Part sane and weird too

Part predictable and part in Brownian motion
Part understandable and also unfathomable
Part enterprising and sometimes, lazy
Part emotional and stone cold too

Part motivating and part pin-on-a-balloon
Part grounded and also on-the-moon
Calm in the face of trouble, agitated at the drop of a pin
Part motivated and dejected too

I may lead a dichotomous existence
And you may find it hard to muse
But
I am not a hypocrite
And you should know that too.

There is a difference.

ENFP/ENTJ ... Mirror, Mirror!...Mirror, Mirror?

I'm following this question on Quora on MBTI and decided to do the inventory via the link given in the question. Did this yesterday or day before in the morning. What do I get? An ENFP.

Hmmm....though I have taken the inventory earlier in XLRI (in the OB class), I couldn't remember the exact description (it's been some time now)...so I decided to look it up. ENFP - The Inspirer, it said. Yay! ;) Read the article, felt good about myself (can't LOL enough on this thought!) and went to office...

Just out of curiosity, I decided to take the test again at night....the underlying thought being that I had got an ESTJ when in college. Anyways, I believe that a person's personality undergoes a lot of change with change in his/her environment. For the most part. Sometimes, one is able to change the environment according to or with the force of one's personality. All Aquarians are nodding their heads. All their heads.

Anyways, so I took the test again. What do I score this time? ENTJ. The Executer and Leader. Though, to be fair, the Thinking dominated the Feeling by a mere 1%. Shockingly, though, the Judging preference dominated the Perception by somewhere around 44%!

What could bring about the change from ENFP to ENTJ? Did I not take the test properly in the morning or at night? I don't think so.... I answered in all honesty both the times.

So what happened...? Was it a day in the office that brought about a change in the thinking pattern during the day and thus influenced my answers? From an FP to TJ? Was it the blood pressure? :P

Or does it merely reflect on the fact that no matter how strong the inventory, it can't give a 100% accurate result?

Or does it expose and prove the most deeply ingrained truth in the universe -- that the only constant in this world is Change?

10 Reasons to work with a Gujarati! ;O)

      Just the other day, we were having a discussion on which all Indian communities make better/best business people...as usual, the most common names cropped up - Marwaris (duh!), Sindhis, Gujaratis, etc. etc. As we were debating about the best 'clan', I came up with a few points that make Gujaratis stand out when compared to others... (#psst! Taken extra care to not include any MBA-ish and cliched terms... ;) )

1. They are like your personal Munnabhai MBBS – they’ll lift up your mood in every interaction!
2. You are assured a lifetime of personal relation, without making too much of effort!
3. You are assured of honesty in dealings!
4. If you ever make a mistake anywhere in dealing with them, they will treat it as just that – a Mistake – and not a breach of trust!
5. If they ever make a mistake, you can be sure they will rectify it without a fuss! Most of the times, they’ll point it out before you can!
6. You can sleep well at night if your money’s with a Gujarati! Most of the times, he will be more concerned about returning your money than you will be about getting it back!
7. You can be assured of quality. That’s the one thing we don’t compromise on.
8. You can be assured of one thing – which is that a Gujarati will earn and let you earn too! Unlike some people, who will juice out your margins and not bother whether you’ll survive. Our underlying thought is always, “He also has a family to feed, yaar!” …and that makes a lot of difference in your approach to business!
9. A Gujarati will leave no stone unturned to satisfy your requirements! He will travel half the world if he has to, but he will get you what you want!
10. Narendra Modi is on his way to become the PM of India…do you have a choice???